


Alone

by penceyemo



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Destiel - Freeform, M/M, angel!Sam, angel!dean, human!Cas, reverse!verse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-18
Updated: 2014-02-03
Packaged: 2018-01-09 03:16:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1140790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/penceyemo/pseuds/penceyemo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Reverse!Verse, where Cas is human and Dean and Sam are Angels. Eventual Destiel.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

           Alone. You don’t know the meaning of alone, until you’ve been forced to spend years travelling on your own, with no family or friends, no pets or lovers, no companions to talk to on long car rides. The bare ache of loneliness seeping into your bones while you struggle to sleep in an empty bed; the hot searing anxiety you get when in dangerous situations, and the deep emptiness you feel when you remember no one will mourn you, or even realize you’re gone. Castiel Novak knows all about this.

           When he was younger, he had it all; A loving family, friends, a dog, and a big house in a nice neighborhood, but all of that was destroyed in a huge house fire when he was eight. Castiel regrets every single day that he survived it, wishing he had gone down with his family. He was passed from foster home to foster home for years, until he was old enough to be off on his own. Since then, he’s just been driving around the country completely alone, doing jobs for gas, motels, and diner money. It was a harsh life, and he hated every minute of it.

           The only reason he hadn’t just offed himself, like his mind had been telling him to do since he was eight, was because of the jobs. When he had first left for the open road, he was about 17, and was not very observant. He would scan the newspapers for odd jobs in whatever town he was in. Then he’d do as many as he could before moving on. It wasn’t the greatest way to make money, but it was the only way he knew how. It took him about a year to notice a pattern, and another couple of months to put all of the pieces together. When it finally hit him, he had to take a few days just to comprehend how much of a life changer this was. What he had found, in a nutshell, was everything that goes bump in the night, all of the vampires and werewolves and ghosts of your nightmares, actually exist.

            He had to do a lot of research, make plenty of hospital visits, and go through a hell of a lot of trial and error, to figure out what kills what enough to make a job out of it. Now, he travels the country looking for Supernatural disturbances, hunts them down, and destroys them. It wasn’t a nice life; it was dangerous, lonely, and required a lot of research. It did however, help other people. The knowledge that what he does saves lives, even if they don’t know it, is enough to keep him going.

~♢~ 

            Castiel woke up screaming, again. He always got night terrors, it wasn't anything new. Not wanting to go back to the dream, he got himself out of bed, dressed, and looked at the clock. 5:47 AM. Not too early to get breakfast, if he could find a diner that opened this early. He hopped into his car, and drove around till he found one at the edge of the town.

            He had barely even sat down in a booth yet, when he found a case. According to the man sitting in the booth next to his, there was a town around here where all of their wishes came true. Castiel stopped listening after they started getting crude with what their wishes would be, and opened up his laptop to research this town.

            When the waitress came up to take his order, he ordered his usual; coffee, eggs, and bacon. He ate that every day for breakfast; he knew it was bad for him, but he honestly didn't have it in him to care.

            While he ate, he found out that the town had this Chinese restaurant with a wishing fountain, that would grant any wish. He decided that after breakfast he would pack up and head over to check it out. But for now, he just wanted to enjoy a nice breakfast without the anxiety hunting always gave him. It wasn't the monsters itself that scared him, it was his lack of backup. If something went horribly wrong, he wouldn’t be able to escape with his life.

~♢~ 

            It took him awhile to find the Chinese place, but not that long to figure it out. He had done extensive reading  in the past about coins, ancient symbols, curses, and those kinds of things. In this case, it was a mixture of all of those. There were only two coins in the well when he went, and one of them was significantly bigger. When he looked closer, it also appeared appeared to  have some sort of a symbol on it, which sent off a flag in his head. When he attempted to pick it up to examine it closer, it was stuck to the bottom, which confirmed his theory. The coin had some sort of a wish granting curse, and he just needed to get it out and destroy it to lift it. Unfortunately, no matter what he tried, he could not get it out. He went up to the counter  and asked who had been in here today that used the wishing fountain, but there were had no answers for him.

            He took a picture of the coin on his phone, calling it a day, and went back to his motel to do a bit of research on it.

            He found out that the symbol on the top was actually a rune, that meant "luck," and that the coin had a very old curse on it. If you made a wish with it, the coin would grant it, and everyone elses' who used the fountain; but the only way to remove it, was for the original wisher to take it out.

            In the end, he was able to figure out who the coin had belonged to, get him to remove it, and destroy it. On his way out, he hesitated, then turned back. He took out a coin and flipped it into the fountain.

            "These things are stupid, and they normally don't work, so I don't know why I'm bothering with this." He started off, speaking softly to the water.

            "But if you could work now, even after I took out the coin, that would be great. What I want, is a friend. Or a pet. Or something, anything that is alive and will miss me if I die. Please." Cas walked back to his car, heartbroken, because he knew his wish wouldn't be granted.


	2. Chapter 2

Castiel was in the library when it happened. He was doing some basic research on reapers, when he noticed that someone was watching him. He immediately went on high alert, watching him from the corner of his eye. After awhile of this, he turned to look him dead in the eyes, but instead of looking down in surprise like any normal person would do, the man smiled at him. Castiel was startled, and looked down instead. He didn’t look very threatening, but then again, in his line of work he’s seen cute little animals turn very deadly. He was about 6 feet tall, with short brown hair and green eyes. He was still staring at him, but his goofy grin had faded to a smirk. He didn’t look like he wanted to kill him, so Castiel decided to get to the bottom of this, and confront him. Steeling himself, Castiel closed his book and looked over at the man one last time before walking over.

The man didn't look surprised that he was approaching him, but he did look a little put off at the pissed off look that was taking over Castiel’s features. When he got to where the man was sitting, he crossed his arms and stared him down. After a few seconds, the man spoke;

“Hey hot stuff,” He said, winking. Castiel’s jaw dropped in shock, that was not what he had expected.

“What the fuck is your problem.” Castiel said back, after a pause. The man just smirked at him.

“Why were you staring at me. And who the hell are you.” He added, wanting some answers.

“Well for starters, my name is Dean Winchester, and I’m an angel of the lord.” The man said, grinning. A man that was sitting at a table near us jumped up and whacked him on the head.

“DEAN.” He said, glaring at him.

“Sorry Sammy,” Dean replied, rubbing his head.

“No way.” Castiel sputtered, “Theres no way that’s true. You can’t be.” He abandoned the pissed off face and looked at Dean suspiciously. Dean shrugged, and Sammy rolled his eyes at him.

“You can’t just spring that on people Dean.” He said, then turned towards Castiel and extended his hand.

“I’m Sam, and in my brothers words, I’m also an angel of the lord.” He whispered, the only one remembering that they were in a library. Castiel just stood there in shock, his mind reeling. He had never believed in a God, or heaven, or angels, or anything like that. It was a Godless world he lived in, he had convinced himself, because no merciful God would allow him to suffer so.

“So are you going to sit down and tell us your name?” Dean asked him, smirking. Castiel squinted at him, but slowly sat down in a chair across from Dean.

“Castiel… Novak.” He said, still suspicious.

"That's what I thought." Dean grinned at Sam, who nodded back.

"So Cas...." Dean started, but when he looked back Castiel was gone. His smile deflated.

~♢~

Cas finally slowed his car when he started to near his motel. He had no idea what had just happened, but he didn't like it. The second he got the chance, he had ran out if there as fast as he could, hopped in his car, and sped away. He didn't like how the two "Angels," were looking at him, in fact, he didn't like how they had called themselves angels. Castiel knew that angels didn't exist, so who the hell are they? He shook his head as he pulled into a parking spot, putting it out of his mind. He didn't want to think about them any longer, and more importantly, he never finished his research on reapers. He'd have to finish up on his laptop, because there was no way he was going back to the library.

A few days passed with no signs of those strange men, and they finally stopped filtering in and out of his thoughts. As much as he didn't want to think about them, it always came back to them. He was starting to relax now though, it didn't seem like they were going to make another appearance. He'd moved on to another town, a few states over, to make sure of this. In the town he was in now, he was investigating a possible werewolf infestation. He was sitting in a diner, looking over some notes and the newspaper report, when it happened again. Dean Winchester, apparent stalker and "Angel of the lord," and his brother sat down across from him in the booth.

"Hey buddy. Pretty crazy with this werewolf eh? There hasn't been one in this town in centuries." Dean said, smiling cheerfully at Cas. Cas just picked up his stuff and walked away, freaked the hell out. Someone else could take this case, he had to get out of here. As soon as he got to his motel, he packed his stuff and moved town again this time he went east, up to Maine. It took a few days since he was in Florida before, but eventually he ended up in a little town that had a promising skinwalker case. Cas had never actually encountered a skin walker before, but he recognized the signs, and knew how to take it down. A stab In the heart with a silver dagger and he's gone. Skinwalkers can get pretty deadly though; this is one of the many times that he wished he has someone to help him out.

When Cas finally made it to the last crime scene, he couldn't believe what he was seeing. Dean  will-stalk-you-across-the-country Winchester, and his freakishly tall brother Sam, were already on the scene talking to the witnesses. This was the final straw. Cas closed his eyes and took a deep breath, then made his way over to the two psycho "Angels." They glanced over at Cas when he got over; Dean gestured to him, and said,

"Ah, this is our colleague, Agent Singer. I'm glad you decided to show up; Mrs. Anderson here was just about to tell us what happened to her husband." Dean smiled at the tiny woman, who sniffed, and gave him a watery, half hearted smile back.

"Well Larry was out late last night, and I had just assumed that his work had held him late. He worked at the hospital; he was a respected surgeon, so that happened often. But when hours had passed since he was supposed to be home, and there was no sign of him, I started to get worried. So I walked outside to get in my car, to drive to his work to see where he was, when I saw him laying face down on the driveway. I called an ambulance, but when I turned him over, he, he" She burst into tears, unable to finish. Looking around, he was able to put together the rest of what had happened. There was a body about 10 yards behind her, covered in a sheet. Dean thanked her, and patted her on the back. They walked over to the body, and asked the officer nearest it if they could examine it, flashing him their fake FBI badges. He gave them permission, and they removed the sheet.

"Missing the heart." Dean observed, looking over at Cas, than Sam. Cas glared at him, and whispered,

"You're lucky there's people around right now, because we need to talk as soon as we're out of here. Fucking psycho." Dean laughed, unaffected by the name calling.

"Alrighty. In the meantime, we have a body here, with two other matching victims and no full moon. I think we all know what that means."

"A skinwalker. I'd already had had my suspicions from the previous vics in the newspapers, put this proves it." Cas responded, half to himself. They thanked the officers, and left the scene. Cas headed for his car, and Dean and Sam followed. When they were all in his car, Cas turned around and glared at them.

"Alright, start talking." Cas told them angrily. He didn't like anything about this, and it was time for some actual answers.

"We already told you that we're angels of the Lord." Dean paused when Cas let out a laugh.

"No, I'm being serious. We are actually angels of the Lord. We figured you might want a little help with your cases and stuff. A little company." Cas jerked his head, almost driving off the road; Cas pulled over and stopped the car. He turned around and looked at them, trying to control his rage.

"Shit. You must have been there at the Chinese place. I swear to god. You sick fucks have been following me since then, just to pull this prank? Get out of my car. Now." He turned around, crossed his arms, and waited for them to get out, ignoring the hot tears he knew would come if they didn’t get out immediately. He heard a flapping noise come from the back, but ignored it, assuming it was them moving around to get out. When half half a minute went by without the sound of the car doors opening, Castiel looked in the back of his car, but there was no strange men sitting in the back. Cas turned back around quickly, his mind reeling.

~♢~

Castiel sat on the edge of his cheap motel bed, and thought. He thought about the fire, and the loneliness, and the two strange men, and god, and life, and he didn't move. He sat there for hours, not moving or eating or drinking or sleeping. He was good at this, because thats what road trips were to him. When he needed to think, he would jump in his car and sit in silence and drive till he found a case somewhere far away from where he was. Even when he didn't need to think, whenever he needed to switch towns, he would have to drive for hours in complete crushing silence. It was worse when he tried to listen to music to drown it out. The music just reminded him of how alone he was, having to turn it up to fill in the spaces where conversation should be flowing.

In the end, Castiel decided to give them a chance. He wouldn't jump towns again, but he wouldn't seek them out. If they show up again, he’ll just go with it. He still didn't trust them, and he was half hoping they were actually prankers, but the stunt they pulled threw him off. There was no way they could have gotten out of his car without opening the doors, and he wanted to know how they did it. The odds were starting to stack up in their favor that they're actually angels, and he was starting to be won over.

~♢~

Three days later, Castiel was about ready to give up hope. There had been no sign of the men since their disappearing act in his car, and he didn't think they were going to show up. Oh well, he thought, I don't need them any anyway. He continued on with his business, and went on with trying trying to take down the skinwalker.

Eventually, another body turned up at a house near the last vic. The whole way there, Castiel wondered whether they we were going to be there or not. The rational part of his brain told him that it had been four days since they disappeared from his car, they were probably long gone; but there was was a tiny part of his brain that hoped they were there. It had been since, well, never, that he'd had company, and that same tiny part of his brain hoped that if they ever crossed paths paths again they would stay with him.

Castiel pulled up at a curb outside the house, and parked his car. He hopped out of it and patted the roof, smiling. He loved this car, it was his safe place. No matter how many motels he stops at and towns he goes through, he will always have his car. The car is a ‘67 Chevy Impala, and it was the only thing he had left to remember his family with.  

He glanced around as he walked up the hill to the house, but saw no sign of the Angels. He was disappointed, but he still had a job to do. Cas interviewed the family of the deceased, checked the body (no heart,) and came upon a case-breaking fact. One of the neighbors dogs had been seen when they had came across the body. The husband hadn’t thought anything of it, and he still didn’t, but it put the nail in the coffin for the skinwalker. Castiel stopped one last time on his way out to make sure Dean and Sam hadn’t made their way in without him noticing, but they weren’t there. Feeling another pang of disappointment, Castiel left to interview the neighbor.

Before he went in, he grabbed a silver dagger he had hidden under his seat and slipped it into an ankle holster, just in case. He walked up to the door and knocked, but no one answered. Castiel looked around him to make sure no one saw him, and picked the lock. The door swung open, and he reached down and plucked the dagger out of its ankle holster. He had a feeling he might need to use it. He walked in slowly, not sure what he would find inside. Castiel walked around a corner and his heart stopped, his hand gripping the handle of the dagger tighter. There were three dogs in there, all sitting up and staring at him. He couldn’t tell how many, if any of them, were skinwalkers. His heart was pounding out of his chest, as he approached the group. One of the dogs cocked its head, while the other two started wagging their tails. The two that were wagging their tails were golden retrievers, and the one that had cocked its head was a german shepherd. Naturally, Castiel approached that one first. He walked up to it slowly, extending his hand. Shapeshifter or not, German Shepherds have a nasty bite, and he didn’t want to spook it if it wasn’t the shapeshifter. The dog sniffed it carefully, and determining that he wasn’t a threat, licked his hand. Castiel patted him a few times, then with his other hand ran the side of the blade down its back. It didn’t react, so he turned to the other dogs. The one nearest him was wagging its tail and panting at him, wanting to be petted. Castiel walked over to it and repeated his steps, with the same results. Castiel turned to the last dog, who was drooling on the couch, and started the process with him as well. Before he got a chance to test it with the silver, He heard the sound of another dogs paws running across the floor behind him, and turned around just in time to see a second, very pissed off German Shepherd leap at him and shift midair into a rather large, pissed off looking man. The man hit Castiel square in the chest before he had time to react, knocking him into the coffee table headfirst. He was knocked out cold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry guys, I'm not John Green, I won't kill off Cas. I'll try to get the next chapter up ASAP, but again, it's midterms week and isn't that easy to find the time to write; I literally wrote this chapter in between studying. Anyway, theres a new SPN episode tonight, are you guys excited? Or if you're reading this another night, what did you think?(the 1-21-14 episode)


	3. Chapter 3

Castiel woke up to a dull ache in the back of his head, and a massive headache. Groaning, he dragged himself to consciousness to take note of his surroundings. He was in a lumpy bed in a shirt and boxers, and he didn't seem too hurt. Suddenly everything that had happened in the last couple of weeks came rushing back to him, and he sat up quickly, his eyes blowing apart. Using his leverage from sitting up, he flung himself out of bed and into a corner of the room, reaching for a weapon that wasn't there. What surprised him, when he looked around, was he was in his own motel room with two surprised faces looked back at him; two familiar, stalker-angel faces.

Castiel took a defensive position, but with the shock of seeing them and his recent head injury, his head rushed and he started to sway. Dean was over there an a split second, and caught him. He dragged Cas back over and sat him on the bed.

"What..." Castiel started, looking at the brothers with a mixture of confusion and suspicion.

"When the skinwalker knocked you out, we stepped in and took care of the skinwalker, and brought you back to your room. How's your head?" Dean said, looking concerned and touching his forehead. Cas cringed away from the touch, but Dean kept his fingers there and closed his eyes. Within a few seconds, all the pain was gone. Cas's eyes flew open, shocked.

"Holy shit." He muttered, looking at Dean in awe. "What did you just do?" Dean looked ruffled, and tapped his fingers against Cas's forehead.

"What, did it not work?" Cas brushed his fingers off, and adjusted his shirt.

"Assuming you mean the lack of pain in my head after you touched it, it did work, don't worry. I want to know what the hell you did," Cas glanced over at Sam, who was sitting quietly at the kitchen table watching this all go down.

"I healed your noggin," Dean said, sitting down on the bed as well, against the wall.

"How?" Cas demanded, turning towards the angel.

"It's an angel thing." Dean said, "It's would take too long to explain." Cas looked at him suspiciously, and Dean sighed.

"Stop looking at me like I'm about to bite your head off. As much as I'd like to solemnly swear I'm to up to no good, my purposes are pure. Mostly." Dean winked, and Cas rolled his eyes.

"Okay, but you have to admit I have a right to be suspicious." Cas grumbled, still a little shook up about the whole thing.

"This is true. If I were you and some strange dude showed up and told me he was an angel, I would be too." Cas nodded, and smiled at him. Dean got up and walked over to Sam, asking him to pick up some beer and pie. Sam agreed, and disappeared into the sound of wings flapping. Cas's jaw dropped when he saw it in person, not just hearing it from the back of his car.

"Figured we could use some pie and beer right about now. What?" Dean was interrupted when he noticed the left over shock from Sam leaving.

"Yeah, you get used to that." Cas nodded, taking it in. Next time he wouldn't be taken by surprise. It still scared the shit out of him when out of nowhere, a few seconds later Sam appeared with arms full of beer and snacks.

"SAM! You forgot the pie!!" Dean exclaimed, after rifling through the bag.

"I didn't forget it, they didn't have any at the place I went to." Dead grumbled to himself, while cracking open a beer.

"If you're an angel, then why are you drinking and asking for pie?" Castiel asked him, curious.

"Just cause I don't have to eat or drink doesn't mean I don't enjoy it." Dean shrugged, and slumped into a chair.

"Well we can take my car and find a place that sells pie if you want, just give me a second do get dressed," Cas suggested, standing up slowly this time. "Speaking of which, why am I undressed?" Dean laughed and put down his beer.

"You were knocked out cold when we got you back here, we figured sleeping in a suit and trench coat would be uncomfortable. And I'll take you up on the pie trip, but you're buying since I have no money." Cas grabbed another suit out of the closet, where he had hung them, and pulled on his pants.

"Do you own any clothes that aren't a part of a suit?" Dean joked, looking into the closet.

"Of course I do Dean. I own many pairs of socks and they don't necessarily go with suits. Dean chuckled at this, taking a drink of his beer.

"You sure are something, Cas." Castiel paused and looked over at him, it was just now registering with him that Dean had been calling him Cas since they met.

"Cas?" He asked. Dean grinned.

 "Hell yeah, Cas. it suits you. Much better then 'Castiel', that's too stuffy." Cas nodded, and finished getting dressed. On their way out, he grabbed his wallet and Dean went to get another beer for the road.

"You can't bring alcohol in a car Dean, if we get pulled over I could get arrested." Dean pouted, but put it back.

The car ride there was interesting. Dean wouldn't stop complaining about how slow they were going, being used to angel transport. Eventually, Castiel turned the radio on, but Dean refused to listen to the station he had put on, so he had to explain to Dean how to change stations so he could put it on one he liked. It took him the entire ride there to find a station he liked, but he was happy with that as long as he didn't complain any more.

The store itself was even better. Although it had sounded like Dean picked up pie often, it obviously wasn't often enough, since he had no idea what he was doing. As soon as they got into the store, he stood in the middle of the doorway not sure what to do. Cas grabbed Dean's elbow, and pulled him towards the pies. Castiel walked to the next aisle to grab some other groceries he needed, but when he got back, Dean was gone.

"Fuck. I did not just lose an angel in a grocery store." Castiel rubbed his temples, and prayed the he Dean wasn't too far away. Dean came around the corner with a mouth full of pie, and the box in his hand.

"You called," Dean said happily, putting down the pie.

"Jesus christ." Castiel muttered, running his hand through his already messy hair. Dean wiped his hands on the table that the pies were on, and smiled at Cas.

"Grocery stores are great, man." Dean said, picking the box back up.

"You've never actually went to a store before have you" Cas asked him, rolling his eyes.

"Nope. I usually just send Sammy." Dean picked out another pie, and started to open it. Cas slapped his hand away, taking the boxes from him.

"You can't just eat the pies in the store Dean, you have to buy them and bring them home first." Dean looked disappointed, shrugged it off. He turned to walk into another aisle to see what was in it, but Castiel's wallet couldn't afford him getting into everything he wanted to try.

"Oh no, you're staying with me. Apparently I have to watch your every move, because you have no idea how to behave in public. Castiel grabbed Deans hand, and dragged him to the front of the store to check out. They held hands all the way back to the car, because Cas was afraid Dean would walk into traffic, and Dean just thought Cas's hands were nice and warm, and he liked the way they felt holding his.

On the way back to the motel, Dean turned the music up loud in the car and sat happily in silence. It was like dealing with an adorable man sized child, but Cas was okay with that. Even though it hadn't even been a day since they had joined him, and despite previous encounters and earlier suspicion, he was already starting to feel a weight lifted off his shoulders. When they pulled into the motel, Cas turned the car off and Dean tried to unbuckle his seat belt. Having never ridden in a car before, Dean had no idea how to handle a seat belt, and it had been a struggle just to get him in it. Cas sighed, and pressed the button on the buckle, releasing him. Dean thanked him, and they both got out of the car.

When they entered the motel room, they found that Sam had gone. Dean shrugged, explaining that he didn't always stick around. He stopped by a lot, since they were brothers and very close, but that didn't mean he spent every second with him. Cas pulled out a couple plates from the cabinet and put the on the counter, putting large pieces of the newly bought pie on them. Dean walked over and grabbed two beers from the fridge, and went to sit on the bed. He leaned against the wall and popped the top off from one with his fingers, and shoved the other one between his knees until Cas sat down. Cas grabbed the pies and a couple forks and sat down on the bed with Dean, but facing him on the end. Dean and Cas switched off, Dean taking a plate and handing him a beer.

"I'm gonna be honest with you Dean, I've never actually had a pie. My parents died when I was young, and the foster homes I stayed at never had it. I just never got around to trying it on my own."

"CAS," Dean said, sounding offended. "Pie is literally the most important thing in the world. how could you not have tried it before. Now shush and take a bite, I want to see your face when you try it for the first time." Dean reached over and popped the top off from Cas's beer while he took a bite, and laughed when Cas literally moaned at the first bite.  

"Ohmygoditssogood," Cas tried to say with a mouth full of pie.

~♢~             

"Cas buddy, I think we might need to make another pie run soon." Dean said, stretching. They had almost polished off both of the pies by now, but Dean had a rather large appetite, and wanted more.

"Dean, it's two in the morning." Cas mumbled from his bed. Cas had been sleeping for hours at this point, and was not happy about this interruption. "Wait a minute, why? There was a whole pie left." Dean didn't respond, and happily dumped the two empty pie boxes into the trash.

"I wanted pie and you were sleeping, there was nothing else to do." Dean said, and sat back down at the kitchen table.

"Holy shit. Alright, well, we'll go in the morning." Cas mumbled, then turned around to go back to bed. "Oh, and feel free to go do other angel things instead of sitting there watching me sleep all night." Cas added.

"Now, why would I pass this up?" Dean asked, laughing. But in the morning when Cas woke up, Dean had disappeared to do whatever it is Angels normally do when they're not hanging out with humans. Cas went on with his usual morning, and ate breakfast. While he was showering, he heard the sound of wings flapping, and Dean calling his name.

"I'm in the shower." Cas called back, grabbing a towel to get out. Dean opened the door and walked in, asking Cas to take him to the store.

“DEAN!" Cas yelped, and shoved him out of the bathroom.

"What? I asked nicely." Dean replied, confused.

"You can't just walk in when someone is showering!" Cas told him, exasperated. "I'll take you in a few minutes. But I still need to get dressed." Cas wrapped the towel around his hips, and walked out of the bathroom to grab clothes.

When they were ready to go on another pie run, Cas had to buckle Dean into his seat again, because he couldn't work the buckle.

At the store, Dean wanted to go off and pick out the pies on his own while Cas grabbed more beer, but remembering last time, Cas said no and grabbed his hand, afraid that Dean would get into more pies. Dean didn't mind. They walked around the store for awhile, Dean wanted to see what else was in there, and they weren’t in a hurry.

~♢~

A little while after they had gotten back from the store, Sam showed up to tell them about a case. It was a few states over, but it really needed to get taken care of. There was a crossroads demon in the town, and they had to get rid of it. Cas packed up his stuff within 10 minutes, an expert at it by now, and they headed out. Sam got impatient with the car and left to go do something else, but Dean rode along with him. It was nice not having to take the ride alone, Dean was good company. They talked almost the whole way there about the most random things, and when they weren't talking, Dean turned the music up loud and they sat there in companionable silence.

The next couple of weeks were pretty uneventful. They handled a few cases, made a bunch more visits to the store for pie, and got really close. Cas had assumed that he would never have anyone to call a friend, but here he was. Sam would pop in every once in awhile as well, and they became friends too, but not as close as Cas and Dean. Granted, Cas didn't think it really counted that Dean and Sam were his only friends, because they were both angels. Either way, it was a million times better than it was before they came into his life, and he was so grateful for that.

Car rides were the best, instead of driving all by himself, Cas had an actual person(well, an angel) to talk to. And taking down monsters was a million times easier as well; If Cas made a mistake, or couldn't take them down himself, he didn't have to worry because Dean was his backup. Even when it wasn't that dangerous, Dean still came along just to help him out.

~♢~

The first time Cas took Dean to a diner with him for dinner, Dean ordered three pieces of pie before Cas cut him off.

"You are a bottomless pit. My wallet, however, is not." Dean pouted, but Cas just asked for a check. Cas went to diners for almost all of his meals; he couldn't afford nice restaurants, and he didn't have a kitchen to make his own food in. Of course this was super unhealthy, but Cas didn't really care. He loved diners, and he couldn't afford anything else. Even though Dean didn't eat anything besides pie, he still came with him every time Cas went to eat. He just ordered two to three pieces of pie, and talked to Cas while they ate.

Dean and Cas always held hands when they went to diners, or the stores, or pretty much just any place in public. It wasn't necessarily a romantic gesture, Dean just liked to get into things, and Cas didn't want him too. Or, that's how it started off anyway. After awhile, it was more of a habit than anything. Dean would grab Cas's hand as soon as they got out of the car, and they would stay like that until they got back into it. It was nice, a comfort that neither of them had ever had. Cas hadn't really dated when he was younger, girls just hadn't caught his interest. Dean being an angel with no actual physical form, hadn't really had hands before to hold.

Everything was going great. A few months had passed by, and Cas and Dean had fallen into a routine of pie runs, monster killing, and driving around the country. Unfortunately, one case they were working on got really nasty after they found out it involved a fallen angel, and things were thrown completely out of balance. While they were trying to hunt it, Dean and Cas got separated, and Dean was cornered by the fallen angel. The building they were in had been angel-proofed, so Dean couldn't just poof out of there and get him from behind. Before he could make a move, Dean was grabbed by the throat, and thrown against the wall. The man cut out his grace, and got out of there. Dean slid down the wall, and called out Cas's name before passing out on the floor.


	4. Chapter 4

Dean woke up and felt nothing; or, that's what he thought anyway. When he clenched his fist he could feel his hand tensing up, but strangely, he couldn’t feel all of the ligaments and joints and skin moving together like he usually could. He tuned in to what was going on around him, and found silence. This made him panic, but when he opened his eyes to see what was going on, he could barely see anything. Looking around, he saw the bed he was laying in, a chair, a table, Castiel, and Sam. Sam and Cas were sitting at the table, anxiously looking back at him. Dean sat up. The scary part about what he was seeing, was that that's all he saw. He couldn't see the dust particles he knew were riding the air current coming through the open window, and he couldn't see the grains of wood in the ceiling like he normally could, nor could he see the individual fibers on the blanket that was over him. He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. Castiel stood up and walked over to the bed, looking sad.

"I really don't know how to tell you this Dean. I really wish I didn't have too." Cas sat down next to him, and patted his hand. Dean looked confused and scared, but didn't say anything.

"I guess you should just go ahead and say it then. What the hell is going on with me?" Dean asked, finally able to find his voice, even though it shook. Cas took a deep breath, then looked at the floor.

"Dean, remember how we were fighting that rogue angel?" Dean nodded, confused.

"Well, he cornered you..." Cas finally looked in his eyes, but paused.

"Dean, he cut your grace out." Deans heart dropped, and his face paled. "I'm sorry. Sam and the rest of your angel friends are doing their best to get it back, but it doesn't look great. They already took down the angel who stole it, so they can't get it back from him. I'm so sorry." Dean was speechless. He looked straight ahead, and clenched his fists. His mind was numb, and his body was catching up with it. He tried to breathe, but he just couldn't take in air. His whole world was literally crashing down around him. Cas opened his mouth to speak again, but Dean passed out before he could get a word in. Cas looked up from him to look at Sam, but Sam had left.

Cas was devastated. Sam blamed him for what had happened, and he knew that Dean would too. As soon as Cas had found Dean, he had prayed to Sam to get his ass down here as soon as possible and save Dean. When he had shown up, he had discovered that dean's grace had been stolen. He was human now. Cas filled him in with that had happened, but Sam just turned his back on Cas, and started trying to fix Dean. The rogue angel that had stolen Deans grace was long gone by now, but when Sam had determined there was nothing he could do about the grace for now, he healed Deans injuries and left to hunt it down. Castiel dragged Dean back to his hotel room, cleaned him up, and waited for him to wake up. It took three days.

He didn't blame them for hating him for this, he hated himself too. This is why he had spent all those years alone. He can't even be around angels without ruining their lives. He was going to have to accept that Dean and Sam would move on, and Castiel would be alone again. And that's how it was going to be, probably for the rest of his short hunters life. It's a fact of life that everyone dies alone, and he wasn't an exception.

~♢~

Dean woke up an hour later in a cold sweat, jumped out of the bed, ran into the bathroom, and promptly started throwing up into the toilet. Cas ran into the bathroom, and stayed with Dean while he puked. He had never puked before, since angels never got ill. Dean had tears streaming down his face, and Cas sympathetically rubbed his back until he finished. He shuddered, and sat back. Cas got him a glass of water to flush out the bad taste, and he chugged it.

"What. The hell." Dean gasped, wiping the tears and sweat off his face.

"It's called puking Dean. It sucks, but it's a part of being human. You're probably going to be sick a lot, for a while since your body hasn't built up immunity to anything yet." Dean groaned and leaned his head against the wall.

"So, this may not be the best time to bring this up, but since you're human, you're going to have to stay somewhere. I understand you probably hate me because of this, so you don't have to say here. But if you want to, I'd be happy to let you stay with me." Dean looked at Castiel, confused.

"Why would I hate you cause of this Cas? It isn't your fault. I let him corner me, and that's my fault. So cheer up man, you’re not the one that was just heaving his guts out. And yeah, if you don't mind, I will stay with you. Even if I didn't want to, there's nowhere else to go. By the way, I kind of threw up on my shirt." Dean looked down at his shirt and made a disgusted face. Cas laughed.

"Alright. We'll have to get you some new clothes, since that's probably the only shirt you have. I guess you can borrow one of mine for now, but I'm not entirely sure I have one that will fit you." After searching through his clothes, Cas was able to find a shirt that fit him, and they left to go shopping for new clothes.

Almost all of the shirts that Dean picked out were plaid, and Cas had to laugh at that.

"What? I like it." He said defensively,  while Cas let go of his hand to grab all of the shirts. He also picked out some pants and socks and boxers, so that he wouldn't have to borrow Cas's when his got too dirty to wear. On the way home, Cas had to pull over so Dean could puke again. This time he knew what to expect, but it still wasn't pleasant.

~♢~

During the day, Dean seemed fine. He would laugh, smile, joke, and just seemed happy. But during the night things caught up with him. He would wake up screaming, from a nightmare he swore he couldn't remember. It would take him hours to calm down and fall asleep again. Eventually, Cas gave up trying to sleep through it and would crawl into Deans bed, put his arm around Dean, and just stay there with him until then both fell asleep. Cas always woke up before Dean did, so in the morning he would just sneak out of his bed and continue on with his morning like nothing had happened; but something was happening, and Cas couldn’t put his finger on it.

It all became clear one night when Cas had caught a cold. He had fallen asleep early and slept all through the night. When he woke up, he panicked that he hadn’t been awake to help Dean when he woke up, then noticed that there was an arm over him. Cas turned over, and came face to face with a sleeping Dean. His heart flew to his throat, and his fingers tingled. He sat there, frozen, until Dean started to stir. His eyelids fluttered open, and the sleepy green of his eyes crashed over Cas like waves. Cas sucked his breath in, his chest filling with warmth. Dean blushed and half smiled.

“I… couldn’t sleep.” Cas smiled back, and laughed.

“I figured. It’s okay.” Dean sighed, and Cas’s stomach growled. They both laughed, and sat up.

“I suppose we should go get breakfast. Can I get pie?” Dean asked, completely serious.

“Dean you can’t…yeah, sure. You can get pie.” Cas said fondly, standing up.

“Cas,” Dean said, staying where he was. Cas turned around, then sat back down.

“Yes Dean,” Cas responded, looking at him. Dean leaned over and kissed him, smiling.

“Thank you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow I'm really sorry this ended up so shitty. The ending sucks, I know, but I just wanted to get it over with. I'm gonna be starting another one soon, so theres that. Anyway, thanks for reading! You guys are the best.(Don't forget to leave kudos and comments so I know you're there <3)


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